Have you ever looked around at your life and thought, “This is good, but…something’s missing?” That’s how I felt for many years. I felt a hollowness inside. A feeling that I was living the ideal of what someone else thought I should be, not my own. I’ve worked countless jobs that brought me no joy. I craved the freedom and fulfillment of working for myself, of building something meaningful. Before I found the joy in my current relationship, I spent time in the wrong places, with the wrong people. Deep down, I knew I was destined for more. I deserved a better life and a better income. I sought a deeper sense of worth.
My Turning Point – Turning 50
Then I turned 50. It wasn’t just a number; it was a wake – up call. I felt a shift in my soul., a sense of time slipping away. Age creeps up on you, doesn’t it? Suddenly, I was facing changes I hadn’t expected. My body was changing. Menopause symptoms appeared. Even the texture of my hair had changed. It was a scary, stark reminder that time is precious.
Reflection and Regret – Looking Back
I started looking back, really looking at my life. The mistakes I’d made, for myself and for my children, I carried a lot of regret. I wished I had done some things differently. Still, I knew that yesterday had long been forgotten. You only get one chance to get it right. I vowed from that moment onward to make the second half of my life beautiful – fulfilling, joyful and purposeful.
Times of Struggle – Questioning Worth and Functional Depression
There were times I questioned my worth. I went through periods of functional depression. I masked my sadness with a smile and a drink. People saw a happy face, but inside, I was struggling and felt alone with my feelings. I started walking, and walking changed my life. It brought me joy and lifted my spirits in ways that I never thought possible. My mood changed. I got up early to go for a walk before the sun came out. I felt a calmness and peace in my spirit while walking that nobody close to me understood.
The Hardest Part – Peer Pressure and Lack of Support
I recall talking to my friends and family about how enjoyable walking was. It was easy to get moving and to start feeling better. I had more energy, and my body started changing. It’s ironic though, isn’t it? Sometimes, the people closest to you are the ones who struggle to see your vision. They don’t mean to, but they can’t always understand to see your dreams. The fear of being alone, the fear of judgment, held me back for so long. I wanted to quit my job, to build my own business, to inspire others. But the “what ifs” were deafening.
The Turning Tide – Faith and new Foundation
Recently, I gave my heart to God. It was a turning point. My perspective shifted. I found a new foundation for my path. I believe Jesus is working in my life and I know that He has a plan for me. This faith has given me the courage to pursue my dreams, to step out of my comfort zone.
Encouragement and Hope
If you’re reading this and feeling that “something is missing”, know that you’re not alone. It’s never too late to bring your vision to life. It’s ok to let go of what no longer serves you, to surround yourself with people who lift you up. It’s ok to rank your own happiness and put yourself first. Don’t give up on what feels right in your heart. You have the strength within you to create a fulfilling and joyful life. Trust your instincts and your emotions. You’re not crazy. The Universe is talking to you. Listen to it and don’t be afraid.